Cupid found shot with arrow
HEAVEN, Kingdom (AP) — February 14th. Steven, known by Cupid to nearly the whole world, was found murdered this morning, his heart pierced by an arrow. Archangel Michael discovered his frail, battered body high in the clouds as he was out for his early morning jog. The moment he was discovered a trumpet blast resounded from heaven and every angel bowed their head in sorrow. A beloved angel and friend had fallen.
At this time, authorities are more concerned about the whereabouts of Cupid’s bow and arrow. “In the wrong hands the world below may never fall in love,” stated Michael. “Humans below relied on Cupid to bring them together. Without his arrows the humans might seize to exist.”
Cupid’s death is a shock to all in Heaven and on Earth. Valentine’s day will never be the same. Thankfully, Cupid was able to bring love to many on earth before his death. Sources close to him say he only had a few more arrows left when he flew off the night before. He was found on a cumulonimbus cloud somewhere over Virginia. This was where Cupid spent most of his time and is most likely why the state motto became Virginia is for lovers.
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